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ThE M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N ReVoLuTiOn

Top Comrade Profiles
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Top Comrade Profiles

This page will give information on the top dogs in the M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.Ns. Read them, but dont try to assasinate them because that would be really annoying due to some strict employment laws like not being able to hire children (or adults) without paying them. Also slavery is illegal which is a bit of a bugger.

If you join, you could work/bribe/sleep your way to the top. The Leader's position can be challenged by anyone who is willing to go into the "MYSTERON Pit of Doom" with the leader. This involves the challenger and the leader in a fight to death. The challenger is armed with a broken toothpick, blindfolded and chained to a pole with a big red target on his/her chest. The Leader is given a chain gun, flame thrower and samurai sword as well as several throwing knives. Whoever wins is the new Leader.

The Leader

Rank: Admiral of the Fleet, Commander of the Air Force, Field Marshall, M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Leader.
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number: 00001
Awards: Bad Guy of the Year 2000,2001,2002,2003,2004,
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent of the Year 1997 - 2005.
Alias: Classified
Location: Classified
Age: Classified
Previous Employer : Classified
Present Employer : Self Employed
Mission: security leaks, world domination.
Skill: getting away with it.
Matial status: Classified
Star-Sign: Classified


Felton Broschinsky

Rank: Major General of the Great M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N army.
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00002
Awards: Best Second in Command of a evil organisation bent on taking over the world.
Alias: Murdock
Location: Unknown
Age: 31
Previous Employer : Soviet Union
Present Employer : The Leader
Mission: Eliminate pikies and security leaks.
Skill: Mass-demolition, Assaination, Close combat, vehicular Control aka Drving.
Matial status: Widowed from treacherous Wife.
Star-Sign: Demonicus


Mose Libertini

Rank: Rear Admiral
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00003
Awards: None
Alias: Cornielius
Location: England
Age: 17
Previous Employer : Soviet Union
Present Employer : The Leader
Mission: Build boats, make sure ocean is still there.
Skill: Taking Orders, not getting seasick.
Matial status: Single, has commitment issues.
Star-Sign: Pondscum


Rueben Laferve

Rank: Cheif Interrorgator, hairdresser and stylist.And Captain of the Army.
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00004
Awards: Stylist of the Year 1999, 2003
Alias: Daniel
Location: China
Age: 18 1/3
Previous Employer : Y.M.C.A and Chinese Army
Present Employer : The Leader
Mission: Get information out of people whilst beautifiying the organization. And leading the army in battle.
Skill: Interrogation, fashion, hairstyling, manicures, wearing pink stuff and martial arts.
Matial status:Unmarried
Star-Sign:Geminorm


Ozzy McMcmac

Rank: Head of Security and being the silent one out of all of us.
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00005
Awards: None so far
Alias: Elfie
Location: Unknown
Age: 23
Previous Employer : Soviet Union
Present Employer : The Leader
Mission: Eliminate pikies and security leaks.
Skill: Ask him
Matial status: Not sure
Star-Sign: Unknown



Franz Muir

Rank: Head of Research and Development
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00006
Awards: Nobel prize for Improved Assasination Methods
Alias: Rupert
Location: Rossi /Italy
Age: 30
Previous Employer : microsofty ice creams uk ltd
Present Employer : The Leader
Mission: Find new ways to "eliminate" enemies
Skill: sweets,nuts & sauce specialist/head of kp roast nut security and protector of the chivers jelly
Matial status: cohabitating with monks
Star-Sign: Aliphatic


Bob Bobo

Rank: Felton Broschinsky's assistant
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00007
Awards: Best coffee maker 2004, Winner of 2K4 tournament
Alias; Coexist
Location: Reading
Age: 69
Previous Eemployer: Millhouse restaurant
Present Employer: The Leader
Mission: Be Felton's assistant
Skill: Kicking Felton's ass atUT 2K4
Starsign: dgffhj


Kimber Hokula

Rank: Paint Surveillance Supervisor
M.Y.S.T.E.R.O.N Agent Number:00009
Awards: 2nd Place Best Paint Watcher 2003. Gold Medal at Paint Drying Olympics.
Alias: Jeneny
Location: Next to a "Computer"
Age: 18
Previous Employer : Loddon Valley Leisure Centre
Present Employer : The Leader
Mission: Watching paint dry - full time
Skill: Annoying in a unpikey way
Matial status: Joel
Star-Sign: Aries

This is not a complete list of the entire organisation as that would take too much time to write and i got writers cramp. And besides it would take up a whole lot of space which would be just silly.

The motherland will rise again.